I feel it coming

I feel my ed coming back. I don't want it to, but I find myself restricting more and more without even realizing it. Its 4:00 in the afternoon and all I have eaten today is a bananna oatmeal milk shake. My head hurts. I know I can't start this again. I have two kids to take care of, one of which I am breastfeeding. I don't want to take any nutrition away from her. I don't want to be sick again.